I've been thinking about dying lately.  No, not "I'm gonna die!  Oh, sh$%^&*, what am I going to do?"  More like, "what do I want to accomplish now that I'm in my 50's and I have a lot less time to get things done?"

I would like to take a whole bunch of science classes, like chemistry, biology, and physics.  But they take a lot of time and energy.  I could devote the next 10 years to this alone - for what?  So I can be really smart?

I would like to get really buffed.  You know, weight lifting, aerobics, the whole bit.  But I don't know how, and I'm kind of lazy.  This ship may have sailed.

I would like to be the kind of person who sends cards all the time, not just for special occasions.  As it is, I don't send cards at all, and when I do, they are usually late.  Accomplishing this would be like swimming upstream, I fear.

I would like to stop watching so much TV.  But I think I really need an intervention to get this one done.  I have the TV on even as I write this.

I would like to be more forgiving to people in general.  Is this really possible?  I've heard people say that they can forgive others, but I think they just secretly harbor resentments like the rest of us normal folks.

I would like to make a difference.  Create or do something that really matters.  This one I think has a real possible positive outcome.  But again, I don't know who to contact to let them know that I'm available for being amazing.  For free, even.  What, do I write a resume that starts with a Job Target of "want to make difference by being a wonderful, stellar human being.  Willing to work for free."  I just don't think anyone would really believe me.  I have done some volunteer work, but my current volunteer gig is kind of boring.  I sit around doing nothing a whole lot.

I would like to throw huge parties that people were dying to attend.

I would like to attend all of the grand slam tennis tournaments.  But only if the weather isn't too hot.

I would like to celebrate all the religious holidays in a decidedly secular manner.  I fear this might offend some people.  And I really don't want to do any fasting for those holidays that require it.  Give me the feasting holidays only, please.

When I think of some more things for my list, I'll let you know.  Maybe making the list is the closest I'll ever get to some of these things.